So you’re using your PC or laptop and decide that it’s not slow enough for you. You also want to waste more time. Here are a few ways to get that machine and your workload moving like a marble through maple syrup.
- Install browser toolbars. This is often the first step to slowness. Google, Bing and Yahoo all provide (for your convenience of course) toolbars that give users the benefit of a search window so they can save a quarter of a second by not moving the mouse to the search window already provided by the browser.
- Get a coupon program on that machine! A great way to slow your machine is to visit coupon sites and install the programs they offer so you can print coupons and begin to enjoy browser ads that seems strangely specific to your Internet searches. Go ahead and give them your email for the added benefit of having your SPAM increase exponentially.
- Only have one email address. Let’s say you have an interest in a consumer item – any consumer item. You visit websites that feature this consumer item and you sign up to receive “valuable promotions” and/or access to “members only” sections of these websites. The email address you provided is the only one you use. Because you enjoy visiting websites that feature your item of interest, surely you won’t mind receiving hundreds more messages from companies who bought the list containing your email address. They may offer similar items, or they may tempt you with offers of personal care products, relationship enhancement pharmaceuticals, flashlights and fake news.
- Never clear out your browser history and always save passwords. Anytime you visit a website, content from that site is downloaded into your PC, and you never know when you might need the images and cookies from a site you visited four years ago. You also want to save any password when the browser asks you if you would like to do that. Passwords are usually stored in a single file accessible and keeping them will ensure that you don’t have to waste time entering that password again. This function is great for ensuring that you get to experience the identity theft process with your bank.
- Ignore your hard drive. You’ve used your machine for a couple of years now and the hard drive has dealt with the use by putting data all over its discs. So if you want a program or file, you ask for it and the hard drive then looks all over the disc looking for the pieces of that program or file. To make the hard drive slower, just keep letting the drive put stuff wherever it wants. Don’t do a defrag or a disk cleanup. No sense making the hard drive’s work any easier.
- Don’t call QBS for help. If you’re satisfied with a slow machine and the underlying issues that are causing the slowness, no need to call us.
However, if you do want a refreshing change of pace, call QBS and we’ll make sure your machine and your time are better used.